128: Dr. Melisa Moore on the Science and Psychology of Truly Restful Sleep
Struggling to fall asleep? You might be trying too hard. In this powerful conversation, sleep expert and psychologist Dr. Melisa Moore breaks down the biggest misconceptions about sleep—and reveals why the more you try to sleep, the harder it becomes. Instead of forcing sleep, this episode introduces a simple but transformative shift: learning to wait for sleep rather than chase it. Melisa, who specialises in working with neurodivergent children and their families, also brings a compassionate and nuanced perspective to sleep challenges that often go overlooked. Through a blend of science and psychology, she offers a refreshing approach that helps you rethink your relationship with rest and begin to trust your body’s natural rhythms.
Throughout the conversation, you’ll gain a deeper understanding of why “trying” to sleep can actually keep you awake, and how sleep pressure and circadian rhythms work together to support natural rest. Melisa also explores how habits like napping can interfere with nighttime sleep, why overthinking and anxiety tend to surface at night, and how to gently calm the mind without force. Drawing from her work with neurodivergent individuals, she highlights how sleep can look different from person to person—and why honouring those differences is key to finding what truly works. She also touches on the hidden downsides of sleep tracking, reframes what “normal” sleep really looks like, and shares practical, accessible tools you can use immediately. The result is a grounded, reassuring approach that shifts sleep from something you control to something you allow—by creating the right conditions and letting your body do the rest.
Timestamps: -
00:00 – Intro
01:10 – Why sleep is not a luxury
03:30 – Normal sleep vs real sleep problems
07:30 – Sleep myths you still believe
13:00 – Why you can’t force yourself to sleep
17:15 – “Try to sleep” vs “Wait for sleep” (game-changing shift)
19:00 – The truth about naps
30:00 – Sleep aids & melatonin
45:45 – Anxiety, overthinking & nighttime thoughts
48:30 – Why you should stop tracking your sleep
50:00 – Mental techniques to fall asleep faster
56:00 – What the book teaches & practical tools
Connect with Melisa Moore:
➡ Website - https://www.drmelisamoore.com/
➡ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Dr.MelisaMoore/
➡ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/drmelisamoore
➡ LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/melisa-moore-6589a340
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🌐 Connect with Simone Niles:
Website: https://www.simoneniles.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/simonenilesofficial/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/simonenilesofficial
Disclaimer
The views shared by guests on the podcast are their own and are shared for discussion and insight.